Big puzzles like this don’t get solved overnight do they?

Tuesday, 11 May 2010 22:00

Somehow, since the retreat, I find myself more aware of everything that I do during the day. Mostly work things, but also in my free time. It’s as if I’m trying to make myself realize which of the things that I do all day I actually like, which things I don’t mind doing and which things I don’t like or even dislike so much that they put me in a bad mood.

Examples:

• Monday morning meetings: don’t mind them.
• Concoct experiments behind my desk: quite enjoyable.
• Doing the actual experiment: hmm, depends on the experiment.
• Teaching: yeah, like that.
• Reading articles: no, not so much.
• Networking, arranging, getting a grant and talking to sales reps to get fancy new equipment: quite fulfilling!
• Finally getting the equipment, but not being allowed to do the tests to get it up and running, because that’s something a technician can do: puts me in a real bad mood!

Conclusion? Science is interesting! I like to think about it, I like to talk about it to other people and I don’t mind listening to other people talk about it. I sometimes like to practice it, but I don’t like reading articles about it. And I definitely like to finish things I started!

What does that mean though? It’s like a puzzle really: What job suits me best? Teaching is of course a good one. But that will leave me no time to quietly muck about in a lab, think about great new experiments all by my lonesome. From the things I enjoy in my spare time I know I need to be alone with my thoughts sometimes to put the chaos back in order and reflect and prioritize, etc. Refilling the empty pipette tip boxes can actually give me energy! So, stay in the lab after all?

Anyway, big puzzles like this don’t get solved overnight do they? I will just continue keeping record of the things I like and dislike, figure out if there are common themes in there and try to fit the puzzle together. Hey, maybe this ‘problem’ will even solve itself, like my car-got-towed-problem. Turned out, they just towed it round the corner to get it out of the way! Now, what common theme does that imply? Perhaps it means that if I just wait and keep my eyes open I will eventually always find my car back and the job I am looking for?
You tell me